I May Not be the Leader for YOU!

It’s hard to believe it’s been a year since I started this journey of sharing my perspective on leadership. I began writing to stay connected, to keep the wheels of my mind turning on the practice of leadership, and to create a space that would compel me to reflect on my own path. Early on, I realized I had to tackle a common misconception: how easily we slap the "leader" label on ourselves and others in the workplace.

Think about it. Someone becomes a supervisor or manager, and suddenly they're a "leader." Senior teams in an organization chart proudly call themselves the "leadership group." While there's a certain accuracy in associating the term "leader" with organizational hierarchy, that title often stems from the authority of their role, not necessarily their skills or abilities. If you've been a regular reader, you won't be surprised that I bristle at this notion.

True leaders? They're the people followers choose to follow. They’re the ones who prioritize the needs of the collective over any single individual. And leadership itself? It's the combined skill and ability of every member of the group.

So, I challenge you—especially those in positions of authority—to resist the urge to call yourselves or others "leaders" simply because of your organizational standing. You are not a leader… unless you are genuinely committed to putting the group’s needs first, creating an environment where others can thrive and succeed, and actively nurturing leadership potential throughout the entire team.

Whew, I’m glad I got that off my chest!

This past year has been a deep dive into my own leadership journey, examining my strengths, weaknesses, successes, and failures. There have been many times in my career when I wasn't a leader—when I couldn't put others' needs before my own, or contribute meaningfully to the group's success. Sometimes it was my own shortcomings (skills, interest), sometimes it was the group dynamic, and sometimes it was the environment. These weren't necessarily negative experiences, nor did they mean the group failed to produce results. They were simply tasks, fleeting moments that held no personal significance for me.

As I progressed in my career, developing stronger skills and seeking out people and places that resonated with me, I began to find purpose even in mundane tasks. It was then I realized I could apply my leadership abilities in a much broader sense, regardless of the task or group. I also came to terms with the fact that I’m not the right leader for everyone. As my leadership skills expanded, they also became more refined; my strongest traits shone, while lesser abilities receded.

A reputation began to form—a blend of my personality, skills, and experience. But a reputation is just that: a perception, often accurate but never complete or static. Within organizations, your reputation can simultaneously open doors and slam others shut. It can be built and shattered in an instant, both by your actions and the actions of others.

Throughout my career, I've been called a maverick, a rule-breaker, a challenger. I’ve been told I’m bold, opinionated, and difficult. And truthfully, all of these descriptions hold some truth. Yet, how you perceive these traits determines whether I'm seen as an awful or a significant contributor to a group’s leadership. I might not be the leader you want. I’ve found that these character qualities are often viewed as dualistic: either liked or disliked, depending on the circumstance or the people involved. Being a maverick can be brilliant or disastrous, depending on the desired outcome of the person I’m interacting with. My team might love that I challenge authority; the person in authority, however, likely won't see it the same way.

Having had the immense pleasure of working in people-centric environments for over 30 years, I've continuously learned and refined how to best utilize my character traits, smoothing their rough edges without diminishing their impact. I’ve compiled a list of my qualities and created personal mantras to guide my leadership development, aiming to enhance my skills while turning tension into something productive. I know I’m not the leader for everyone, but that doesn’t mean I can’t be the leader for more people. When I review this list, I can quickly pinpoint areas for improvement, and I hope to continue growing as a leader, just as I hope others continue to influence and guide my development. I encourage you to create your own phrases about your character qualities—it’s a powerful way to define your personal leadership development goals.

You are direct but not demanding.

You are confident but not aggressive.

You are clear but not rigid.

You are fearless but not foolish.

You are innovative but not reckless.

You are decisive but not impulsive.

You are candid but not rude.

You are sincere but not naive.

You are open but not tactless.

You are supportive but not enabling.

You are creative but not chaotic.

You are curious but not aimless.

You are confident but not arrogant.

You are inspirational but not performative.

You are independent but not isolated.

You are unconventional but not rash.

You are original but not erratic.

You are self-reliant but not anti-social.

You are free-thinking but not negligent.

You are knowledgeable but not closed-minded.

You are passionate but not overbearing.

You are expressive but not dogmatic.

You are defiant but not destructive.

You are principled but not rigid.

You are courageous but not careless.

You are resilient but not unyielding.

You are powerful but not overpowering.